What I’m learning on my coaching journey
I didn’t become a coach because I had it all figured out. I became a coach because I didn’t. Halfway through the AoEC practitioner diploma, watching footage of myself coaching, I’m seeing things I missed in the moment. It’s intimate, sometimes uncomfortable, and very useful.
What surprised me most is how at home I look. Not polished. Not performative. Present. If you want ADHD coaching advice and practical coaching strategies for neurodivergent professionals, this reflection will help you become a better coach in the real world.
No “coach voice.” Just me
What really landed is that I don’t put anything on. I’m not slipping into a role.
Warm, grounded, relaxed. That matters more than I thought.
“You bring in your end-self benefit, that’s how it feels to me… it’s very lovely.”
That wasn’t about a clever question. It was about who I was being in the room. You can’t fake that.
Watching yourself work changes the work
On video you hear what you actually said, notice the pauses you held, and see where you filled space that didn’t need filling. Feedback plus footage gave me one clear message. I already bring a lot to the space.
If you’re training, record sessions where appropriate and legal. It gives you data you can’t get live. The AoEC diploma builds this into the process and it works.
Structure that feels safe
I explain what’s happening, timings, purpose, confidentiality, and even my own nerves sometimes. With neurodivergent clients that clarity matters. It builds trust and keeps the session predictable enough to do real work.
Honesty helps more than polish
In one session I noticed I was summarising too much and said it: “I feel like I’m doing all the work.” I used to cringe at that kind of honesty. Now I see it as useful. Not because I’m right, but because I’m willing to see it and shift it.
Partnership, not fixing
I don’t coach to fix. I coach to walk alongside. I still catch myself slipping into helper mode. It comes from care, and it can hijack the process. The skill is to pause, step back, and hand the power back to the client. That’s partnership.
Still learning
I’m not aiming for perfect. This isn’t a checklist. It’s a mirror.
- Let the client summarise their own thoughts
- Ask less at wrap-up, let silence do more
- Challenge with clarity and kindness
- Agree outcomes early, circle back to them
I wasn’t trying to become someone new
I wasn’t trying to become a coach. I already was one.
This process gave me the clarity to see it, trust it, and build on it. It’s helping me be more myself, on purpose. Quietly powerful.
Final thought
If you’re wondering whether you’re “doing coaching right,” try a different question.
Am I showing up real. Am I present with people, as I am.
Simple ADHD coaching strategies to start now
- Record one session you can legally record, then watch it back once. Take three notes only.
- Agree the outcome at the start. Re-state it with five minutes to go.
- Keep summaries short. Let the client do the last one.
For ADHD-related coaching approaches, NICE has helpful guidance on support and interventions in adults. See NICE NG87.
Want support on your own coaching journey
If you want practical ADHD coaching advice tailored to your context, book a short discovery call and we’ll map two or three coaching strategies you can use this week.
You can work with me through 1:1 coaching, drop into a Flexible Brain Session, or check pricing. If you’re workplace-focused, see consultancy and training. Or just get in touch.